


Medicine

by Mazewalker



Category: Medicine (Harry Styles), One Direction (Band), nick grimshaw - Fandom
Genre: Bisexuality, Canon Compliant, First Time Blow Jobs, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Self-Discovery, Sexual Identity, inspired by harry's song medicine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-04-07 21:56:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14090514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mazewalker/pseuds/Mazewalker
Summary: Fic based on the unreleased song Medicine which seems to be about blow jobs and is a bisexual anthem. Harry experiementing with his sexuality and trying to see if he’s attracted to men. Cute gryles friends to lovers get together story





	Medicine

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry that there isn't that much dialogue because 1. I hate writing dialogue and 2. The main point of the story is all the things they don't say. Also, it is in 3rd person but switches between perspectives several times throughout. Please be nice.

Harry was a touchy guy.

Nick knew this. For the entirety of their friendship, Nick watched Harry bouncing around at parties, grabbing on to and hanging off of everyone he talked to. He simply loved other people and had a brazen enough personality to express that simultaneously flirty and platonic charm without shame. Being someone who spent a lot of time with Harry, Nick was often the target of said affections and had learned to appreciate them for what they were. He had mastered the art of being virtually unaffected, at least any more so that would be appropriate, when Harry grabbed his face with both hands, made a smug comment about his eyes or lips or what not, and proceeded to interlock their fingers and drag him to the dance floor. It was difficult at first to not be completely swept up in Harry’s all but intoxicating energy, but Nick loved having Harry in his life and would take what he could get. Now, only occasionally did those lustful thoughts intrude Nick’s brain when he was under the influence of alcohol or the loneliness that comes late at night when he simply did not have the energy to push them away.

Above all the things Nick thought he knew, he was sure he knew how Harry was feeling. Behind the cheeky flirtation was a man who, at the end of the day was attracted to women and not to men. Nick knew this, Nick accepted this, and Nick held the friendship he and Harry shared in the highest esteem. Nothing would ever burn as brightly in his heart than that raw closeness. It was safe and it was spontaneous and it was love. Nick was happy. 

Harry, on the other hand, was a bit confused and had been for a while. As the years went by, he found himself growingly aware of the lingering gazes he would catch himself casting at men across the room. What had begun as an unspoken addition to himself after he had a few drinks in him, turned into frequent but still unexpected feelings of warmth that appeared in him during the sober hours of the day. He had never been one to ignore the aesthetic attraction he felt towards men his entire life, but to be honest it was always more of an objective appreciation rather than pure attraction. That’s why he was, more than anything, surprised when the appreciation morphed into something more. A couple years ago, only after he had at least a buzz, would he be hyper-aware when a handsome man with an expensive suit and dark eyes held a handshake a tad too long to be unintentional. And he was all too aware of his own awareness. It seemed that now that part of him had crept into the light and tugged at strings deep in his stomach whenever it found the chance. But he still didn’t really know. How could he? So he continued to enjoy the encounters he shared with beautiful, sultry women all over the world because it was so much easier to know than to wonder.

*

It was an unexpectedly perfect March afternoon in London and Nick had suggested that they should catch up over lunch. They texted quite a bit, but Harry had been so busy working on the album over the last few months, the frequency of their get-togethers dramatically decreased. Nick was not having any of it. He was always busy with the radio show and the never-ending string of social events he attended with his mates, but when Harry was gone there was always a piece missing. The kind of chemistry he didn’t get with any of his other friends. He was over the moon to finally be able to sit down face to face, look in his eyes, and hear him gush about the music he’d been working so hard on. 

“Superstar!” Nick called as he stepped out of his Uber, seeing Harry who had been seated at one of the outdoor tables of the restaurant, fiddling with the straw in his water. “Hope I didn’t keep ya waiting too long. Hair this good takes time.”

As he made his way through the gate and to the table, Harry stood up and embraced him with warm, open arms. It was the exact familiar embrace that Nick knew he had been missing. 

“Been far too long babe! Exposing even more chest to the world I see” Nick said, sitting down and glancing at Harry’s flowing blouse with a plunging opening down the front that seemed deeper than appropriate for restaurant attire.

“I’ll have you know that I’m a pioneer in men’s fashion Grimmy” Harry spoke with an attitude, but couldn't hide his smirk. It really had been too long.

They went through lunch talking about everything and nothing of importance all at the same time. By the end of it, Harry’s stomach hurt from laughing too much and Nick was drowsy from the good food and the hour or two listening to Harry’s melodic drawl telling stories from Jamaica. Nick wanted to listen to some potential tracks on the album and the least awkward way they could come up with was Nick sitting in the passenger seat while Harry aimlessly drove around the city. The stereo pumped out blissful songs full of energy and heart that filled Nick up with an unanticipated sense of pride to be connected with a man full of so many stories. He felt quite lame actually to be having such a strong reaction, sitting silent and still next to the creator himself.

“I don’t know how to interpret the face you’re making” Harry raised an eyebrow and turned towards Nick at a red light. “Good or bad?”

“Good! Great in fact. Favorites are Sign of the Times and the one about someone having your baby. Somehow it is the anthem the world didn’t know we needed. Oh, and the one that went ‘even my phone misses your call’, a very serene experience. I think the single is going to smash in my opinion.”

Nick commenting on From the Dining Table twisted at something inside of Harry. Unbeknownst to himself when he was writing it, it ended up taking a decent chunk of inspiration from his relationship with Nick. He had mixed it in with a story about a girl he was with and didn’t realize until recording it, what he was actually thinking about while singing. It was Nick. This held a seemingly endless amount of complications because Harry was still so incredibly nowhere when it came to figuring out how he felt about things. 

He had been harboring massive amounts of guilt for not trying to find out because as such an avid supporter of love being limitless and being for everyone and every kind of relationship, he felt like he shouldn’t be so wary about himself. His best friend, an out gay man whom Harry had always supported, was sat next to him and Harry was ignoring a potential feeling inside like he was ashamed. But he really wasn’t. He just had no idea what to do with it or how to proceed. 

He had no idea how to proceed later when Nick peeled off his sweatshirt, briefly tugging his shirt up with it and exposing a large strip off tanned skin, including a curly brown trail of hair leading all the way down. He didn’t know how to proceed when while witnessing this, his words got caught in his throat and his heart thumped a little quicker than it had before. He was tired of not knowing and he was tired of feeling so unlike himself. Harry had almost never in his life restrained himself so much. Where was the Harry that would own any room he entered and charm any person he talked to? He was a smooth guy because he had no inhibitions that prevented him from living freely. That was the Harry he wanted to regain his grip on and he was sure a little music and some booze would do the trick. 

*

Nick wasn’t surprised to see how quickly Harry had wandered over to the bar once they’d entered a club that night. Nick joined him and after a few shots were ready to let go. It had been such a good day and he wanted nothing more than to jump around in a sweaty crowd of strangers, while a mediocre DJ blended together the songs he heard every morning. It was mindless fun that required nothing more of him than feeling the music. By this time in the night, Harry was usually off with a fit girl in a back room or hanging onto a friend group that had inducted him based on his charm alone. Nick by this time would typically have found a hot guy to dance with and the night would carry on. Tonight was different.

Harry remained by his side the entire night and allowed his sweaty hands to find themselves all over Nick far more than usual. At one point a hand slipped underneath the fabric of Nick’s shirt and briefly rested it one of his hips. This was when Nick, wide-eyed and short of breath, turned away swiftly and pretended to be unbothered and simply readjusting. In reality, he was extremely flustered and trying desperately not to show any signs of it. Over and over he reminded himself: Harry is a touchy guy, tonight is no different than normal. Though the intensity and bravery of Harry’s hands and eyes persisted, Nick remained determined to keep himself contained. Drunk Harry had been flirting for years and Nick could remain at a friendly distance. Tonight was no different. 

In the car ride to Nick’s apartment the alcohol was wearing off a bit, but Harry’s resolve did not waver. Dancing next to Nick, watching his body curve and bend and drip with sweat, Harry had felt the familiar desire he had felt for so many in the past. Finally, it was something he was sure about, something concrete. He didn’t know much, but he knew that he wanted Nick and he wasn’t one to not go after what he wanted. He absentmindedly brought a hand up to Nick’s hair and felt him shiver to the touch. He wasn’t sure whether it was good or bad, but he was determined to find out.

Once they ascended to Nick’s flat and kicked their shoes off, Harry rather quickly was pouring himself a glass of whiskey.

“I’m so insufferable to be around you couldn’t wait 10 seconds to get a drink?” Nick joking called from behind him.

“Would you like a glass?” Harry didn’t turn around, but the smirk on his face was evident in his voice.

“Probably shouldn’t… best to try to sober up. Gotta be able to think clearly.” 

“Now, why would you want to do that?” Harry questioned, turning around with two filled glasses in hand. 

“You’re acting well weird you know that? Is there something happening that I’m unaware of?”

Hearing the tone of Nick’s voice brought all the nerves back to Harry’s stomach. He was more than likely about to be extremely humiliated and awkwardly leave with his feelings hurt. It was dumb of him to assume that just because Harry wanted to experiment with him that Nick would too. The feelings wouldn’t go away though and now was as good a time as any to put it on the line. 

Without much thought, Harry tipped up his glass and downed his drink along with the one he had poured for Nick. It wasn’t ideal, but if he didn’t want to back out he would need the help of a little liquid courage. He walked towards Nick slowly and placed both hands on the side of his face like he had done many times before that. Nick’s eyes were full of questions and he was tense underneath his fingers.

“I am going to kiss you,” Harry said matter of factly.

“Wha-” Nick’s bewilderment was cut off by Harry pressing their lips together. The second he did, Harry felt all the tense muscles in Nick melt underneath his fingertips. It was Harry and Nick. They were best friends. They knew each other. They felt at home with one another. This was no different. 

Harry was overly pleased with the outcome so far but was far from done experimenting. He grabbed Nick’s hips and pushed him back into the counter behind them, earning a small pained groan from Nick. Hands grabbing where ever they could make contact, they stood, bodies pressing into each other as close as they could physically be, mouths sloppily reconnecting over and over again. Harry was already feeling swirls and pulls of lust in his stomach. He was thrilled with how excited and light headed the whole ordeal was making him feel. He had never done this before and he wanted to go even further. 

“What is happening” Nick spoke, out of breath, while he used every ounce of self-control in his body to push away from Harry. His success in suppressing any feelings he had was being completely and utterly undermined. Harry had never gone this far before and it felt like this was a line that couldn’t be uncrossed.

“What do you mean?” Harry asked coyly while attempting to go back in for a kiss.

“What I mean is that you are straight and you are my best friend and we are kissing in my kitchen.” Nick dodged the kiss and tried the hardest he ever had to prevent the problem that was happening inside of his pants from growing, literally. The last thing he needed was to ruin drunk Harry’s new level of unabashed drunk flirting with something real. He needed to shut it down before it was too hard to stop himself.

Harry slowly brought his lips to Nick’s ear and whispered: “Sexuality is fluid Nicholas, I want this.” His lips reconnected with Nick, but this time they made wet trails up and down his neck, leaving obscene, wine-colored splotches wherever he touched. Hearing those words were all it took for Nick to completely unravel; He wants this, he wants this, he wants this. 

The dreamlike trance Nick was living in was interrupted by Harry grabbing his hand and dragging it towards the bedroom. The alarm bells sounded in Nick’s head again. Another line, possibly crossed forever by a regretful Harry and a Nick that should know better.

“What are we doing now?” Nick asked and wasn’t sure if he was ready to hear the answer. Harry grinned a far too cheeky grin and pushed Nick back onto the bed.

“You aren’t doing anything. I’m doing something I really want to try.” 

As soon as Harry climbed on top of him and ran his hands all over his body while stripping his clothes off, Nick was absolutely gone. He had completely surrendered to the overwhelming feelings he spent years trying to ignore. He completely, one hundred percent, belonged to Harry. He watched the messy mop of sweat ridden curls kiss its way down his stomach. It was hurried and full of need. As Harry’s warm, wet mouth wrapped itself around Nick’s dick, a million tiny bolts of pleasure shot all through his body. He involuntarily arched his back and curled his toes while Harry worked his way up and down, trying different things as he went. Nick had received some quality head in his day, but something about seeing Harry, smelling his musk, feeling his large hands and fingertips pressing into his hips made it all the more electrifying. He was dizzy from the pleasure. 

“Harry, I’m close” Nick was barely able to get the words out while trying to contain his yelps and gasps. Hearing the struggle seemingly only made Harry more enthusiastic. As Nick came into Harry’s throat, Harry tried to swallow it, but it was a sensation he had never experienced before and he ended up with a decent bit of it dripping down his lips and smeared on his cheeks. The sight of it was almost enough to get Nick hard again.

Harry flopped down on the bed next to Nick and started up at the ceiling. The only noise was their inconsistent heavy breathing and the faint sound of cars outside. 

As soon as the bliss wore off, Nick immediately hated himself. He let that happen when Harry was drunk and he was mostly sober and was in the biased position of having feelings for Harry. Especially when Harry had never done anything like that in his life, and Nick knew because there was no way he wouldn’t have told him about it. Nick was positive that at any second Harry would break the bad news, write it off as an unsuccessful experiment, and break his heart. Nick wasn’t ready to let go of their friendship.

While Harry stared up at the ceiling, the only thing he could think was ‘wow’. He did it. And he was into it. Actually really really into it considering he had only been the one performing the act and not receiving. It was new and exhilarating and indescribably hot to be able to elicit those kinds of dirty noises from Nick he had never heard before. He would do it over and over again to feel him writhe from pleasure under his grip. And he planned on it.

At about the same time they turned their heads and stared at each other. They both looked red and sweaty and the whole situation was a mess.

“How… have we not done that before?” Harry laughed an elated laugh and pushed himself to sit up.

“Wait, really? You don’t regret it yet?” Nick had somehow completely ignored the possibility that it wasn’t a mistake and felt as right to Harry as it had to him.

“Don’t think I could ever regret something that made you look so hot. I don’t know what exactly I’m feeling now, but it is definitely not regret. I was confused for a while but this really… this cleared it up”

“Confused for a while? About being into this?” Nick had never considered that Harry had been thinking about anything like this at all before tonight.

“For a long time, yeah. But now I guess I’m…. bisexual? Or pansexual? I don’t know, I’m not really a huge fan of the labels, but they’re there for a reason so it probably makes sense to just-”

“Sexuality is fluid Harold,” Nick said sweetly, mocking the line Harry had used earlier, but really trying to get through to him. After a moment of stillness, they both laughed and smiled and in a second they were just Harry and Nick again. It wasn’t complicated. It was the easiest thing in the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave kudos and give me some feedback! I haven't written in forever so I want to hear comments!


End file.
